Too Much To Take
by Niklaus Welin
Summary: Harry starts to question his identity after he realizes his true feelings for Malfoy.
1. Chapter 1

CHAPTER ONE

Note- this takes place a month or so after "Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix", and of course I do not own Harry Potter or Draco Malfoy.

enjoy and review!

"COME TO MY MUGGLE PARTY!"

The invitation read. It was written in neat handwriting, on regular notebook paper instead of parchment. Harry couldn't help but smile. After the hellish time he'd had since school had ended, he could use a chance to relax.

**But then again, I doubt anyone can help me.**

It had been two months since Malfoy had stared at him with absolute hate in his eyes, and vowed Harry would pay for putting Lucius Malfoy, Draco's father, in Azkaban. Harry hadn't exactly tried to calm him down, and they had almost gotten into a nasty fight, but Snape had intervened.

**It was just stupid Malfoy. Why can't I forget it? Get a hold of yourself! Nothing he's ever said has affected me…. so why now?**

Harry smacked the side of his head as hard as he could, then slumped onto his bed.

"It's not true, it's not true", he groaned, " It's sick, it's wrong, it's not true",

**Nice Try. You love him, LOVE him, ha ha! You LOVE—**

He pounded his head against the wall. Then, remembering, he sat up and turned to his desk, the invitation still on it.

The invitation was from Elliot Crowley, a Ravenclaw. Harry had only spoken to him once or twice. He yanked open a drawer, pulled out a quill and parchment, and began his R.S.V.P.

**It'll go away. I just need to relax…..**

To Be Continued……


	2. Chapter 2

CHAPTER 2

Elliot's party took place in a cottage its Muggle inhabitants rarely used, if at all. The sky had only just darkened, and the tall oaks that sheltered the dwelling were shadowy titans, looming and threatening. Harry came along the path, dead leaves crackling under his sneakers, his heart beating like a frenzied drum. Lights flashed and flickered in the home's frosted windowpanes, and the sight of warmth improved Harry's confidence a bit.

"He's probably not even here, thank god," he said to no one in particular.

The party was already loud and raucous, though Harry was only a few minutes late when he stepped in. The large den that served as the cottage's kitchen, living room, and dining room was choked with soon-to-be sixth years, laughing, shouting, and dancing. A bottle smashed in the dining room, across the throbbing mass of people, and Harry decided to try to get a drink.

**Anything to stop thinking about him.**

Unfortunately, the crowd was impossible to get through, and Harry had to let it carry him, like waves in the ocean, to wherever it wanted him to go.

He ended up at the bedroom door.

The door pushed inward when he pushed it in a silent sweep, and Harry was surprised to see a group of mostly Ravenclaws and Gryffindors sitting in a ring in the middle of the rustic chamber.

He sat down, but no one seemed to notice. Everyone else was engaged in some kind of conversation.

His deep brown eyes scanned the room. And found Malfoy, his glittering emerald eyes glaring again right at Harry. Harry's knees went weak, and his heart nearly stopped. Then, as sudden as it had happened, Malfoy turned away, and Harry found himself melting into the conversations around him. Thoughts of the beautiful green-eyed boy were gone until an hour later.

"Well", said Myra Hoffmann, a Gryffindor, sighing erotically, "it's been a bloody hour and we haven't played any _games_."

Myra's friends chuckled, and the girl next to Harry giggled at a pitch that, until then, he had thought impossible.

Myra started to continue, but Eddie Jacobs, a Slytherin, (One of two…he he) crowed, "Let's play 'Guess Who's In My Mouth!' "

A few of the jockier Gryffindors and Ravenclaws cheered in agreement.

The girl next to Harry looked sick, and didn't giggle again.

They ended up deciding to play 'Guess Who's In My Mouth'. The girls were to choose a boy, and when the lights went out, they had to go over and kiss them. When the lights came back on, the boys had to guess who had kissed them.

Erik Renesslear, another Ravenclaw, pulled out his wand to snuff the lone electric bulb on the ceiling, but a girl from Gryffindor who was sitting next to him said, "No! Do it the Muggle way", so he strode to the light switch and made a big show of using it. The others hooted and clapped.

With the lights out, everything went silent. Harry's knees went weak again. He was, so suddenly, vulnerable. Just as he thought he heard the girls approaching, a hand tugged on his arm and pulled him roughly away. He couldn't breathe, much less speak, until finally he felt himself being taken out of the darkness into a small space. He heard the door close slowly and deliberately.

He began to try to feel his hands around his prison, and his pale fingers came to rest on a light switch. He flicked it on, and found himself face to face with Malfoy, and this time Malfoy was not glaring at him.

He He….. I hope you like it so far, plz review! Any good ideas on how to end this story? Any? I have one, of course (:) but I might as well see….


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